Penny at 14 weeks

We must be doing something right because sweet Penelope has doubled her weight in the last 6 weeks that we've had her. But it is easy for me to think that I am doing a lot wrong in puppy parenthood. Mostly, I am completely lost on how to communicate with my feral-born puppy. It seems that when I try to make her comfortable, she thinks that I am going to hurt her. When I try to give her a treat she thinks it's a trap. When I want to pet her and give her love, she runs away with her tail between her legs. Is this the additional challenge that comes with adopting a dog that was born to feral desert parents? That is the most logical explanation that I can come up with.

I try to get into her head and understand her even though I am not a dog and obviously do no think like a dog. But I do it anyway. So here she is - born to feral parents, under a log in the middle of the desert. It would have been during the late monsoon rains we got out here. So it was warm and moist and she lived for awhile with her mom and litter mates under a log or more likely a large creosote. And then comes along these two-legged giants that scare her mother away and take her and her littermates to a new place with other dogs, cages, weird food, weird smells and no mother. They find her mother and bring her in a couple of days later. She and her littermates are hungry, traumatized and thus associate the two-legged giants with these negative feelings. Then they spend the next several weeks watching their mother interact with humans. And from what I have heard, her mother would shy away or snip at any human that approached her. So this is how Penny learned to interact with humans.

When I think about it this way, which dog psychologists would probably tell me is completely off, I understand why I still evoke fear in my sweet pup. And I know I need to be patient but sometimes it is so hard because all I want to do is love her and feed her and train her and make her comfortable and yet she often responds with fear to these attempts. Fascinating to watch my own emotions fluctuate, my frustration arise... and then I remember. I am not a dog. I am a human. It may take a whole lifetime of learning how to communicate with her. But I have to be patient.

happy 4-week adoptaversary, Penny!

These notes below were typed up for some friends who are going to puppy-sit for us next week. Thought I'd share them here.

Penny has been with us for 4 weeks to the day. We think she is 12 weeks old even though the rescue told us she was born September 1. The vet assigned her birthday as September 7. She has grown so much, she's had her first taste of Thanksgiving turkey, her first experience with unrequited love (Bravo), has made her first friend (Louie, see pic below), has expelled the worms living in her gut, and has gone on her first night-time adventure with the pack (a walk to Chris's house with Louie, me and Ethan). She is getting used to the ritual of sleeping in her crate, waking up for a poop outside and then snuggling in bed with either Steph or Ethan, or both. Despite her apparent affinity for cuddling in bed or on the couch, Penny still shies away when we turn to pet her. More work still to come...

Here are some things that we are working on with the little pup: 

1) Not shying away from people and their hands. We only pick up, pet, put her leash on when she is calm and relaxed. It is easy to find yourself chasing her around but we are working hard to stop doing this and instead wait patiently for her to allow us to approach. Chasing her to pet her or pick her up only reinforces her early life experience of “being trapped or caught”.

2) Sleeping in her crate through the night. This is her safe place and where she feels most comfortable. Snuggling in the bed in the morning is fine and has become a ritual for us, but she has always slept in her crate.  She often needs to pee and very rarely poop during the night and she starts to feel very anxious if she can’t do this in an appropriate place (her wee-wee pad or outside). Also, she often will eat a bit of kibble during the night.

3) Chewing only on her toys. Penny has ample selection of toys from which to choose for her chewing pleasure. We have given her many options so that she doesn’t feel the need to chew on hands, feet, shoes, furniture, socks, clothes, etc. Please encourage her to chew and play only with her toys and, if you feel comfortable, discipline her with a “chhhttt” if she is chewing on/playing with something other than a toy, especially feet. Because she is a herding breed, we are trying to discourage the tendency to nip heels as she grows older.

4) Lack of possessiveness with toys. Penny should know that the toys ultimately belong to us as the “pack leaders”. We are working with her to freely give up any toy if we decide to take it.

5) We do not play tug-of-war with Penny because we don’t want her to think she can engage in a contest of strength with us, even if we know we can win every time. We’ve read that it can nurture dominant and obsessive behavior, which is exactly the opposite of the calm-submissive dog we want to create.

6) Leash walking. Penny generally follows us around outside, but we are still using the leash most of the time to encourage her to be comfortable with the leash. We haven’t started training her to heel yet but simply give her a nudge a kissing sound when we want her to follow us. The other night, she walked with Louie all the way to friend’s house about a half mile away!

7) Fetch. Penny takes to fetch pretty easily and we’ve started reinforcing this by giving her a treat when she returns to us with the object and after she drops it.

8) Peeing/pooping only outside or on the wee-wee pad. She has to pee so often that sometimes we can’t give her the opportunity to go outside every time. It is important she knows where the wee-wee pad is so that she goes on it and doesn’t learn to pee anywhere in a house.

9) Eating. Penny is a pretty good eater. We change up the kibble and that seems to interest her more. We give her a mixture of kibble and canned food or turkey throughout the day. She always has food available but too much chicken or turkey can make her sick (as we discovered on Thanksgiving).

10) Confidence. Penny has a “stray dog” complex and seems to be very sensitive to loud noises, high energy and changes in her environment. We are trying to gently get her more comfortable with these things by using Louie to introduce her to new sounds, smells or objects. Louie seems to be the best at inspiring confidence in her.

Battle of the Beds

This Thanksgiving, our friends dropped off their wonderful dog, Louie, while they traveled to be with family. The excitement that Penny gets from seeing and being around another dog is heart-breaking. It is like she finally feels comfortable in her own skin again. She wags her tail in a different way, puts her ears back as she approaches him, her little body vibrating with excitement as she moves in for a lick on Louie's enormous jowls. Louie is extremely tolerant of the little girl. He allows her to lick his face, touch noses, even jump on his face or shoulder. He gives a quiet growl when he's had enough and Penny backs away. But her desire to be loved and to interact with Louie tugs at some emotional heartstring in me. It is the eagerness to be loved and to please and the constant rejection. Every day, Penny makes an effort to sleep with Louie in his bed. Louie will have nothing to do with it. Everytime he gets up, walks away, and when she inevitably leaves the bed, he goes back and lays down. Finally I put Penny's bed right next to Louie's so that she'd be close to him but far enough that Louie wouldn't feel intruded on. Penny would put her paws and head on Louie's bed but keep her body in hers. In the picture below, you see her looking longingly toward him.

Soon enough Louie started leaving and sitting somewhere else, leaving our tiny little pup curled up alone in this huge bed. This morning however, I woke up to find Louie in Penny's bed! He didn't quite fit but had curled himself into the tiniest ball possible so that he would fit in the small dog bed.

This evening Louie finally started tolerating Penny sitting on the bed with him, but only for short spells of time. The most heartbreaking is that the people in her life who really do want to cuddle with her and love her are the ones she is most afraid of. She hasn't figured out that the weird two-leggeds in her life are her pack as well. She still shies away, trotting back to her crate with her tail between her legs when approached. Will this ever end or is this just the way she is?

Louie finally caves... but notice how he did manage to score her bunny toy.

Penny is 11 weeks (we think)

Penny has had lots of adventures in the past week!! She went the vet for the first time and took a road trip to LA where she met her Auntie Emily, Auntie Laura and Grandpa Freddo. She has been moved around to three new houses in the past 3 days and has handled it with courage. While a bit shy at first in a new home, if given the opportunity to explore on her own from the safety of her crate, she becomes comfortable quickly. She is immediately loved by all. It is because she is such a beautiful pup!

The vet visit was initially quite scary. Penny was shaking and nervous for the first five minutes and then relaxed. Dr. Megan told us that she can put on more weight and that she is generally a healthy pup. We plan to make an appointment for next week for her to get her second round of vaccinations. 

I am a nervous mother with all of this moving around, but it is necessary if I want to continue training for the half-ironman that I am doing in 3 weeks. Thanks to Emily and Laura for so lovingly watching over my little Penny. We love you!!

11 day re-cap of dog and human learning life together

Some things we’ve learned about raising Penny in the last 11 days…

1. She has a very small bladder.

It is getting bigger everyday but she really can’t hold her pee in for more than a couple of hours. So frequent trips outside to pee, or a well-placed wee-wee pad(s) will help ensure your house doesn’t get peed all over. The first thing she usually does after awaking from a nap is pee, so if you hear her waking up, grab the leash and urge her to go outside for a pee right away.

2. She has a very short digestive tract.

She poops about 4-5 times a day! It usually coincides with about an hour after eating a big meal. But it isn’t like clockwork. And sometimes it takes her a good 10 minutes of walking around outside before she poops. Other dogs’ poop or remains of her own seems to trigger the impulse for her. So  if you are trying to get her to go, find dog poop for her to smell!

3. She hasn’t learned to “come” yet.

We haven’t been very consistent on using the same vocal cues for Penny to come to us. Maybe its because none of them seem to work. We’ve tried just “Penny”, then “Penny, come!” then just “Come” then a kissing sound or a clicking sound. But she doesn’t seem to pick up on any of them. A hand, palm up, near the ground while looking away seems to work, especially if there is a bit of kibble involved. All of this is to say, we walk Penny on the leash because we’re scared she’ll wander off and not come back. Plus, she is so small there is a real possibility that she may become lost from us.

4. She doesn’t really drink water yet.

We’ve seen her drink a little bit but she really likes to drink water when it has been mixed with powdered milk formula. We’ve been slowly watering this milk mixture down but we want to make sure she is getting enough fluids so if that means mixing in the milk powder, we’ll do it.

5. She eats periodically throughout the day.

We try to feed her 1/3 a cup of food (kibble mixed with canned) 3 times a day, but she doesn’t eat all her food in one go. So she ends up having food available all day long. Which is fine. General rule of thumb, total of 1 cup/day of food.

6. She likes her crate, her bed and her toys.

The crate is her safe place, especially if it is filled with her toys, the towel/blanket that smells like her, etc. She’ll often run to her crate if she gets scared. She also really likes her dog bed. She has an assortment of toys that she periodically moves into her crate or into her bed. She knows these are her “places”.

7. She doesn’t like hands coming toward her.

Everyone’s impulse is to pet and touch Penny. However, our little girl doesn’t seem to like this very much. This may be behavior picked up from her feral mom, but she really only allows people to touch and pet her when she is in her bed or crate. She also doesn’t like to be picked up (this is new) and will wriggle and fight to be let free.

8. She likes her sleep and morning ritual.

Penny has been quiet through the night since Day 5 with us. She seems to have picked up on our sleep schedule and stays quietly in her crate throughout the night. We leave the crate open to allow her access to food/water/wee-wee pad, but we keep her gated into a small area to ensure she doesn’t get into trouble. First thing we do in the morning is stumble outside to let her pee and poop. This is usually a quick trip because both human and dog are still sleepy. Then comes everyone’s favorite part of the day – morning cuddles. We bring Penny into bed with us for 15-30 minutes for snuggles in the bed. She seems to really like this and sometimes burrows to the bottom of the bed under the covers.

9. She understands “chtt” as a signal she is doing a behavior that we don’t approve of.

Whenever Penny is doing something that we don’t approve of, we use a short “chttt” sound to signal this to her. She totally understands this sound and will usually quickly drop the behavior. We use this when she is pawing or pushing at the gate, whining, howling, chewing on something she isn’t supposed to, etc. If she doesn’t respond, a quick and assertive tap of the finger on her neck should do the trick.

10. She loves other dogs but they don’t always love her.

Penny is fascinated by other adult dogs, but her puppy nature is sometimes a turn-off for other dogs. She has also not finished all her vaccines, so interaction with other dogs should be limited. If she does come into contact with other dogs, keep her on the leash so that if the other dog shows signs of aggression, you can pull her away. You can always let the other dog meet her by picking her up and turning her butt to the dog for a smell.

10 weeks in the world

Penny is 10 weeks (if, in fact, her birthday is September 1) and she has grow so much in the week since we've had her.

Here is a picture of Penny when we first got her, curled up in her dog bed. She doesn't even fill up the short end of the bed:

And here is a picture of Penny a week older, sprawled out in the same dog bed, filling up the long end of it!

She moving around a lot more as well, exploring new territory around the outside of the house running instead of trotting. We recently discovered the joys of digging in wet sand and then laying down in it - a strategy that is essential for survival in the heat of the summer. 

Penny is also learning how to get the rubs that she so enjoys (we are pretty sure she learned this from Bravo). She lays on her back with her belly exposed just waiting for someone to pass by and rub her belly: 

Or maybe she is just a back sleeper. But she definitely hams it up a bit these days - getting all the rubs and love she's learned so quickly to enjoy. 

After only a week with us, this little pooch has learned so much and the growing physically and mentally is amazing to watch. There are changes everyday which makes us want to sit and watch her, soak in all her puppyness before it is gone. 

Happy 10 weeks little pup! 

getting down on the couch

This is a picture of Penny all wrapped up in Ethan's down jacket. Isn't she just too cute to handle? If we want to cuddle with Penny its either the floor or the couch or bed. So far she's had no problem convincing us that bringing her into the couch or bed is just fine. We rationalize it by saying "she is too young to understand" or "we'll teach her later" ... we'll see...

Penny and Bravo

I was excited to have Bravo come into our home for Penny's first days because I thought it would give her a chance to learn from him and an opportunity to play with a member of her own species. Penny is fascinated by Bravo and mesmerized by his every move, his wagging tail and his big snout. Unfortunately, Bravo does not seem to like Penny that much. When they first met, Bravo tried to play with her but then was almost immediately annoyed by her. And later on that first day together, he growled at her. That one growl instilled a fear in me that Bravo was going to hurt Penny. In some ways, this fear is irrational - Bravo is a good dog; one of the best dogs I've ever known. He is patient and gentle and loving. However, Bravo is also a hunter. He's killed things bigger than Penny and I started to worry that his prey drive got switched on. The other night he snapped at her and it scared me very deeply. What if a tooth hit her unintentionally in the wrong way? What if his mouth caught on her small body? But at the same time, I know that the only way for Penny to learn social skills is to be taught by dogs like Bravo. She needs to learn that after three growls, she needs to back away and leave the dog alone. As a protective dog parent, how do I let go of my fears and allow Penny to learn some hard lessons from Bravo? I feel as if my own fears are making the situation more confusing for both dogs. They pick up on my sense of fear and it makes them both act differently.

The fear is partially just a natural reaction to one protecting a baby but it also comes from a traumatic experience in my childhood. When I was about 13 or so, a dog that we adopted, a young brown boxer, killed my favorite cat - Perseus. On Thanksgiving. I don't think I was mature enough to process the pain that that experience caused me and the fear of that happening again has come up for me when I witness Bravo and Penny together.

Hopefully I can get over my fear, place my trust in the fact that Bravo is a good dog that I've never seen get in a fight, and allow Penny to learn some social cues from a beast of the doggie world.

Penny sleeps through the night

I actually don't know if she slept but she didn't make a peep. She is such a quick learner - it is truly amazing. In only 4 nights, her behavior has changed  from a freaked out little lonely pup to a calm, quiet crate-loving pup. When we woke up in the morning she was just lying in her crate, eyes-open peacefully looking up at us in the bed. She still can't make it through the night without a pee (her little bladder is too small but she always uses her wee wee pad.

Now we just have to bulk her up - still experimenting with foods and what she will/will not eat. While a bit skinny still, she is growing a little bit each day and learning a huge amount all the time. What an amazing experience to witness!

Getting in the groove

Well, it is Day 5 with little ms. penelope and it amazes me how fast she is learning and adjusting to her new environment and the routines that we have provided for her.

This is Penny's typical schedule:
6am - outside to poop/pee in the front with a very sleepy Ethan or Steph
6:30 am - cuddle play time in the bed (absolute favorite time of day for everyone!)
7am - breakfast
7:30 - outside exploration time with Ethan while Steph exercises
8:30 - 5 - Penny settles into a routine as Steph starts work. She has her crate in the bedroom (a gate blocks her off from the rest of the bedroom and the enticing socks and sweaters to chew), her dog bed in the hallway and a pillow under Steph's desk as her "places". She freely roams between them (her favorite is under Steph's desk bc she loves her suede slippers) with Ethan or Steph taking her out for frequent pees (her bladder is so tiny it hardly lasts an hour!) and poops.
5pm - outside exploration time with Ethan or Steph
5:30pm - dinner of kibble soaked in warm milk
6pm - hang out in one of her "places" while Steph and Ethan make dinner
6pm - 9pm - evening hang out and play and cuddle session
9pm - in her crate/gated area for the night

In its more simplified version, Penny's schedule is sleep, eat, pee, poop, play, run, belly rubs, sleep, sleep, eat, etc...

Last night was our fourth night with the little girl. She made it through until 3:30am before we heard a peep from her. She was so quiet and good! Even when she started her baby howls, all we had to do was tap her crate and she went and curled up in it and eventually went back to sleep until 6am.

Ethan and I are totally in love with her and have become those parents that can't see fault in her. All we see is how much she is growing and learning and turning out to be an amazing little pup.

Highs and Lows - first 24 hours

Day 2.
Highs:
- We are 3 for 3 on poops outside!
- Penny walks happily from crate to outside on her leash, following both me and Ethan.
- She's less scared outside and walks around the house on her leash.

Lows:
- Penny does not like to be left alone and howls, which in turn jerks on my emotional heartstrings.
- She has been spontaneously peeing in random places.
- Penny does not seem to want to eat as much today as last night.

Penny's first night in Joshua Tree

As expected, sleep was not deep and restful last night for any of  us. Penny howled for her momma a lot last night and while I totally expected this to happen, it was quite intense to experience it through her heart-wrenching baby howls. We have provided her with plenty of food, milk formula, water, toys, a dromedary filled with hot water and bully sticks. We can't be her momma though. And we can't comfort her when she howls. She has to learn that the whining and howling is a behavior we do not approve of. This is hard, emotional work.

I spent the night thinking about everything I want her to experience in the world and thinking about how I want to teach her tricks. But I also spent a lot of the night thinking about how odd it is that we've developed this system whereby we "own" a member of another species. And I thought a lot about how amazing it is that dogs don't resent their owners for the rest of their lives for taking them away from their mother and littermates. While Penny's howls give testimony to her agony over the loss of her mom and litter mates, her wagging tail on walks around the property remind us that this too shall pass.

Sweet Pup

Day 1. Ethan and I woke up this morning knowing that it was a day dedicated to preparing ourselves to become dog parents. We did not know that we would come home with a sweet pup. She is certainly sweet. Her parents are feral desert survivors from Lucerne Valley - mom a cattle dog mix and dad a spaniel mix. She is pure mutt. We didn't look at any other dogs, didn't visit any other shelters. I found "sweet pup" on petfinder and couldn't stop thinking about her. So, today, we drove out to Apple Valley to meet her. We held her and knew she was the one. We took care of the adoption paper work, paid our $150, bought a crate, bed, toys and food, put her in the car and drove her back to Joshua Tree. The whole drive was a mix of emotions - anxiousness, excitement, fear, sadness, happiness. The emotions that come with taking an 8 week old puppy from her littermates and mom are intense for me. She seems so young, yet I know she needs a loving home and I know we can provide that.

Ethan and I are prepared. We have read Cesar's book on raising the perfect puppy, we have researched breeds, we have talked to friends, we have made lists of supplies we need to get, we have mentally prepared ourselves for dog parenthood. But there are still so many questions - what will she be like? What kind of guidance and parenting does she need? Will she learn to like to the collar and leash that she currently resists? Will she learn to explore outside of her crate? Will she learn to trust us?

The first walk to the house this evening was more than she could handle. The little sweater we'd gotten her was too big and falling off, the collar was too big, the leash too heavy. The environment to new and vast and unknown. She just sat. That is all she could do. She wouldn't walk with me to her house in the way we had planned so that it would mimic the migration instinct. At one point, she just crawled onto my shoes, curled up in a ball and stuck her head between my legs. As if to say, "Enough, I just need a warm place to hide until I wake up from this bad dream and find myself back with my mother and littermates."

She may not be the best walker, but she is certainly a good eater and sleeper. She ate a huge bowl of food and has been comfortably sleeping in her crate since she discovered where it is. Her cries are more like howls that touch deep in my heart. They sound primal. Pure instinct coming through her due to the loss of her pack.

Hopefully she will transform soon and realize that she has a loving new humanoid pack that wants to be on her team. We are committed to giving her the best life we can offer.